Today would have been my mums birthday, I think losing a parent is something no-one can ever prepare you for. I was beating myself up for months afterwards with guilt about how I should have done more and I knew how those thoughts were bringing my energies down but I couldn’t stop them.
They say time is a healer and it is. It’s been two years now and, although whilst writing this post I can feel the tears prickling behind my eyes, most of the time I’m fine and I remember all of the happy times and the wise words! But……it’s that mind body connection again, as soon as I write about the guilt I start recalling that time in my mind therefore all of the emotions come back to the surface, you can’t stop them, they just happen automatically, it’s how we’ve programmed ourselves. In the same way that when you think about biting into a lemon, picture biting into it now and tasting it, you can’t stop the mouth tingling and watering.
If we can be more self aware of these automatic responses we will have a greater understanding of the impact they have on how we feel and therefore we have a greater potential for healing.
If you haven’t read it yet have a look at my previous post which introduces the mind body connection and how your emotions and thoughts affect you physically. It’s such a fascinating subject.
I couldn’t end a post on losing a parent at this time without mentioning the Royal Family and Prince Philip, the unsung hero, his devotion and support for his family, serving his country and the voluntary work he did was truly amazing and my thoughts are with all of the family at this time. It’s hard to lose a loved one but even harder to do so in the public eye.